Accepting there is a problem


Do you dread waking up remembering last night’s binge?

Does your whole life revolve around food? Needing it? Finding it? Eating it? Hiding it? Hating it?

Are you ashamed of your eating behaviour?

It can be very confusing if you don’t understand why you can’t just eat normally and your whole life revolves around food. Even if you’re not bingeing, you can be thinking about bingeing, or planning your next binge like a ritual or restricting your food drastically only to fail a few hours or even days later.

So if food is on your mind ALL THE TIME - I can relate, because that was me - not so long ago...

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I was able to get rid of this all-encompassing disorder with the help of someone who had been through the same ordeal. I spent 10 years of my life with disordered eating and binge eating hit me the hardest.

Just because it is not as well known as Anorexia or Bulimia does not mean it is any less prevalent or any less harmful. It is a very mis-understood disorder.


When I was going through disordered eating, one of the first things I had to do was take back control of my eating which meant I had to work on acceptance. It’s very easy to sweep your problems under the carpet and assume that your eating habits are normal and everyone does it. In your heart you know that what you’re doing isn’t normal eating behaviour.

The very first step of getting help is accepting that you need help in the first place. BED is a very lonely disorder as you feel so ashamed of what you are doing and admitting that there is a problem makes it much easier to achieve recovery. The mere fact that you are here now and willing to learn something new, shows acceptance.


Accepting that what you thought was a bit of comfort eating is actually more than that is a crucial first step.

Putting a name to your disorder and owning it, even if you don’t want to, gives you the power to override the BED and get your life back.

Accepting there is a problem leads to learning how to conquer it.

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Are you looking for reasons for why your disordered eating started? There is never normally one simple answer but looking back over your past to find possible triggers allows you the opportunity to delve deeper.

Understanding your own, personal story encourages so many thoughts and realisations about how your disordered eating may have come into your life. Remembering the influencers through your childhood, your teens, and now adulthood may trigger memories of events or happenings that might link to disordered eating. Who were your caregivers growing up? Your parents, your teachers, siblings, religious leaders, sports coaches, extended family? Thinking about all the people that had an influence over your life, positively and negatively, is a great start to learning more about you and your disorder.

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The first five years of our lives are integral to how our adult lives will play out so remembering your childhood, school years and beyond and talking it through will often give you answers as to why your disordered eating has taken over your life.

This is sometimes challenging for people as emotions from the past or present often get locked away but it is important to bring them to the surface and accept that they are a part of you.


So this is something that needs to be taken into consideration and we work together on a unique system I have created that is personalised to your unique situation. Then we can start to see patterns and gain a deeper understanding as to what our next steps are. This is not about what you are eating – it’s about taking small steps in a new direction that ultimately gets you closer to being able to build some new patterns.


I start the first consultation with my clients by doing a life line.

This means literally drawing a line through four pieces of A4 stuck together horizontally and spending 2 hours talking through your life until now.

We then plot any weight changes to find any triggers that may have caused weight gain or weight loss.


You could do this simple exercise yourself:

  • Take a sheet of A4 paper and draw a line horizontally along it.

  • On the left hand side write the age you were when you realised you had an eating problem. On the right hand side write the age you are now.

  • Then plot on that line your weight as it has fluctuated over time, with the ages at which changes occurred. You are welcome to do this with clothes sizes rather than with weight.

  • Then plot against those weights what was going on in your life at that time.

Can you see that at least some of your history of weight gain and loss can be understood in terms of your life history and life events? Does this feel quite a revelation? There are ALWAYS reasons for overeating and together we can find out what they are.


If you would like to speak to me to find out if I can help you, I offer a free 30 minute discovery call. Just click below to book a time that suits you.


Jody Middleton